If you have read this blog, or known me, for any length of time, you will know that I have been battling with my weight for probably the last 7/8 years in the sense that I want to lose it and am finding it really difficult.
Over the many years, I have tried lots of different things to try and get there. 5:2 diet, Weight Watchers, Slimming World, Fasting, Starvation, self punishment for days where I over ate, vigorous over exercise (whilst still eating horrendously).... the list goes on. I always gave up. Either I didn't see the change fast enough, or I made excuses like I don't have the time, I don't have the money, I'm fine the way I am..... All the excuses and the only person I was screwing over was myself.
I know this won't be easy but this time, I am not giving up!
In the run up to my wedding and honeymoon, I was pretty good so that I felt good in my wedding dress and to be honest, I felt amazing on my wedding day and I love the photos of my dress. I don't see a fat girl in a dress - and usually I would be fulling photos of me apart, going over every little flaw.
But on the honeymoon, I indulged to the max and loved every minute of it. I am now the heaviest I've been in a long time and probably nearly the heaviest I have ever been. For health reasons and because Martin and I want to start trying for a family pretty soon, I know that I need to get my weight under control. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin but I also want to make sure that I am the healthiest/fittest I can be for when I start growing a human!!
So, in this day and age, where else would I go to do some research..... social media obviously. I have been following lots of women and their fitness journeys and seen some of them take on the 80 Day Obsession challenge. I messaged a few of them for some more details and got chatting to one amazing women quite regularly. I decided that after the honeymoon, I wanted to give it a try. So, she became my coach and I started the challenge....
What I love is that you can do them all inside your own home! No running out to the gym, no trying to fit travel to the gym around busy work schedule! Which is perfect, especially when term gets busy.
There is quite a bit to wrap your head around - one half of the program is all about timed nutrition. That is where I need to make sure that I am on point. Fitting in the correct meals at the correct times and around exercise.
Week 1 has been fantastic. I'm really grateful that I'm still on school holidays so I have had a lot of time to get my head around the nutrition plan and tried to fit my meals in the best way that I can. I've been looking at different recipes too, really excited to try them out!
I can't wait to see where this adventure takes me. 73 days to go!!!
Holiday Vibes
Showing posts with label weightloss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weightloss. Show all posts
Sunday, 26 August 2018
Wednesday, 9 August 2017
The Next 80 Days... and how to get through them!
Hi all!
So, last night was weigh in at slimming world and the results were not good post holiday. I knew they wouldn't be.... but I was still sort of shocked by how much I'd put on in ten days...... 6 and a half pounds on! EEK! But there really isn't anything gained by stressing about it. It is what it is - I've put on weight whilst on holiday and if I went back and did that holiday again I wouldn't change what I did so just got to get back on plan and get on with it.
I'm already down around 4lbs since Friday morning when we got back so that's a bonus that that didn't show on the scale!
So now, it's time to really focus. I've got the summer holiday and then start my new job. It's 79 days from today to when I go and try on wedding dresses for the first time. I've got 79 days to lose at least a stone. My slimming world consultant thinks I could lose 2 stone in that time which would be amazing! I'm going to work my hardest to get there starting with today.
When I purchased my last 12 weeks countdown, I got a summer 12 week diary for free.... and it has been sat on the side in my bedroom since the day that I was given it untouched. Seems like a total waste really, and I think it will be a tool that I need to use to keep me focused over the coming months to get me to my goal.
These will be my lifelines to keep me focused on my goals. I filled out the first few pages during my slimming world meeting last night. I've got most of my meals planned for the week ahead and some body magic goals to achieve as well. I've given myself the target of losing 3lbs this week - that's half of the weight that I put on over the holidays. I'd like to get it off in two weeks in possible and then get on with earning my club 10 award.
As some of you will have seen on Instagram this morning, I've already got on with my body magic for today. My gym offered me 30 free days sign up to Les Mills On Demand. I love all the Les Mills classes, body balance, body pump etc. but getting to the classes at the gym can be difficult with the hours that I work during term time.
Today, the weather is absolutely horrid, it's pouring with rain and I really didn't feel like leaving the house so it was the perfect opportunity to try the online services. I tried a new class that I hadn't even heard of before. Sh'Bam! It's awesome. It's very similar to Zumba.... a massive dance party basically. The moves are easy to follow and the instructors are motivating and entertaining. 45 minutes flew by and I was a sweaty mess by the end of it!
Have a great day everyone!!
Stay strong,
Be kind to yourself.
Megan xx
So, last night was weigh in at slimming world and the results were not good post holiday. I knew they wouldn't be.... but I was still sort of shocked by how much I'd put on in ten days...... 6 and a half pounds on! EEK! But there really isn't anything gained by stressing about it. It is what it is - I've put on weight whilst on holiday and if I went back and did that holiday again I wouldn't change what I did so just got to get back on plan and get on with it.
I'm already down around 4lbs since Friday morning when we got back so that's a bonus that that didn't show on the scale!
So now, it's time to really focus. I've got the summer holiday and then start my new job. It's 79 days from today to when I go and try on wedding dresses for the first time. I've got 79 days to lose at least a stone. My slimming world consultant thinks I could lose 2 stone in that time which would be amazing! I'm going to work my hardest to get there starting with today.
When I purchased my last 12 weeks countdown, I got a summer 12 week diary for free.... and it has been sat on the side in my bedroom since the day that I was given it untouched. Seems like a total waste really, and I think it will be a tool that I need to use to keep me focused over the coming months to get me to my goal.
As some of you will have seen on Instagram this morning, I've already got on with my body magic for today. My gym offered me 30 free days sign up to Les Mills On Demand. I love all the Les Mills classes, body balance, body pump etc. but getting to the classes at the gym can be difficult with the hours that I work during term time.
Today, the weather is absolutely horrid, it's pouring with rain and I really didn't feel like leaving the house so it was the perfect opportunity to try the online services. I tried a new class that I hadn't even heard of before. Sh'Bam! It's awesome. It's very similar to Zumba.... a massive dance party basically. The moves are easy to follow and the instructors are motivating and entertaining. 45 minutes flew by and I was a sweaty mess by the end of it!
I danced so hard that I fogged up all the windows in our spare room! It felt great to get my heart rate up and burn some calories! Hoping to get out for a run in the next couple of days when the weather improves. Going to try body combat or attack next on Les Mills on demand. Try and use all the various classes before my trial runs out... .see if it's worth staying signed up as a paying member.
Got a great dinner planned this evening and going to have a high protein snack now to aid muscle recovery after my workout. Feeling really strong and focused for the next 3 months - big changes are going to happen and I'm going to hit some serious goals!
Have a great day everyone!!
Stay strong,
Be kind to yourself.
Megan xx
Friday, 4 August 2017
.... because you are beautiful now!
Hey everyone!
I'm back from holiday - a few days early as the weather sucked the majority of the time and we ended up walking around on a mud bath! After a lovely, all be it wet, time away it's time to get back to business.
I've been feeling a bit stuck in a rut really. When I joined Slimming World, I was really determined - I lost 1st 8lbs steadily from January to April and was really happy with the progress. Things sort of stalled there and then through various circumstances that I've mentioned in previous blog posts, the weight loss stopped. I'm still there at 1st 8lbs and have bounced around it for months. I need to get back on track and some of the photos that were taken on this holiday have acted a bit of an incentive to do so.
Firstly, posting these photos is a difficult thing for me to do. It makes me feel very exposed and vulnerable so please be kind with your thoughts and comments. If there is something that you don't like when you see the pictures - please just close my blog instead of leaving something nasty in the comments. Thanks! :)
I really ummed and eerrred about posting these. It makes me feel very nervous but I don't want to hide parts of my journey. This is the stage I am at now. I read a blog whilst I was away that really inspired me too - it was all about loving your body at every stage of the journey and that is something that I am trying to do. My body is my body no matter what size it is or what the scale says so why should I abuse it with unkindness, displeasure and self hatred - things that I have asked others not to do and wouldn't ever treat anyone else. I don't want to go through the next steps of my journey hating myself all the way. I need to love the body that I have, treat it with the respect that it deserves so that I can get to my goals faster!
Although the weather was pretty naff on holiday, we did get to the beach for a few days. Whilst we were there, my fiance took these pictures of me reading. I would normally have criticised everything I could find wrong with the pictures and then delete them. But this time, I wanted it to be different. So I decided that I would blog them instead! Why not make it all totally public??
Then a funny thing happen. The more I actually looked at the pictures, I couldn't really find anything that I hated. I mean, there are still things I want to change about my body but I don't look anywhere near as awful as I thought I would. Then I started thinking about how I felt that day on the beach. It was a great day - the sun was out, the sound of the waves roaring across the sand was in the distance, I felt relaxed and calm. I have already come so far on my journey and I am proud of the steps that I have already taken to change the person that I am into the person that I want to be.
These photos gave me such a confidence boost that I actually treated myself to a new swimsuit for the next day on the beach. This is was a HUGE step for me as I would normally want to hide my body in black and cover up as much as possible. But I am celebrating my body and trying to believe that every step is beautiful.... so I bought this.....
It's bright and patterned, halter neck and pretty much backless. I felt pretty nervous about trying it on but I was excited too. I wanted to see what I looked like in something a little more sexy.
I was really surprised to not feel repulsed by these pictures. I actually felt that I looked okay. Especially from the back, it's obviously not an angle that you normally see yourself from and I was really surprised to see how good my waist looks in this. Actually, from the back there is very little that I don't like about my body in this photo.... apart from the weird burn/tan lines that I have going on! Even from the front.... which I like less..... there isn't a lot that I can find fault with. I wish my thighs were smaller, and my stomach flatter but my boobs look great and my arms are getting all lean again! So, yes, I am loving my body at every stage....
Then I found one last photo that Martin had taken by mistake as I reached for my phone back and that was where the wobble happened..... and this is the photo that makes me really anxious about posting this blog.... this photo was taken......
I'm back from holiday - a few days early as the weather sucked the majority of the time and we ended up walking around on a mud bath! After a lovely, all be it wet, time away it's time to get back to business.
I've been feeling a bit stuck in a rut really. When I joined Slimming World, I was really determined - I lost 1st 8lbs steadily from January to April and was really happy with the progress. Things sort of stalled there and then through various circumstances that I've mentioned in previous blog posts, the weight loss stopped. I'm still there at 1st 8lbs and have bounced around it for months. I need to get back on track and some of the photos that were taken on this holiday have acted a bit of an incentive to do so.
Firstly, posting these photos is a difficult thing for me to do. It makes me feel very exposed and vulnerable so please be kind with your thoughts and comments. If there is something that you don't like when you see the pictures - please just close my blog instead of leaving something nasty in the comments. Thanks! :)
I really ummed and eerrred about posting these. It makes me feel very nervous but I don't want to hide parts of my journey. This is the stage I am at now. I read a blog whilst I was away that really inspired me too - it was all about loving your body at every stage of the journey and that is something that I am trying to do. My body is my body no matter what size it is or what the scale says so why should I abuse it with unkindness, displeasure and self hatred - things that I have asked others not to do and wouldn't ever treat anyone else. I don't want to go through the next steps of my journey hating myself all the way. I need to love the body that I have, treat it with the respect that it deserves so that I can get to my goals faster!
Although the weather was pretty naff on holiday, we did get to the beach for a few days. Whilst we were there, my fiance took these pictures of me reading. I would normally have criticised everything I could find wrong with the pictures and then delete them. But this time, I wanted it to be different. So I decided that I would blog them instead! Why not make it all totally public??
Then a funny thing happen. The more I actually looked at the pictures, I couldn't really find anything that I hated. I mean, there are still things I want to change about my body but I don't look anywhere near as awful as I thought I would. Then I started thinking about how I felt that day on the beach. It was a great day - the sun was out, the sound of the waves roaring across the sand was in the distance, I felt relaxed and calm. I have already come so far on my journey and I am proud of the steps that I have already taken to change the person that I am into the person that I want to be.
These photos gave me such a confidence boost that I actually treated myself to a new swimsuit for the next day on the beach. This is was a HUGE step for me as I would normally want to hide my body in black and cover up as much as possible. But I am celebrating my body and trying to believe that every step is beautiful.... so I bought this.....It's bright and patterned, halter neck and pretty much backless. I felt pretty nervous about trying it on but I was excited too. I wanted to see what I looked like in something a little more sexy.
I was really surprised to not feel repulsed by these pictures. I actually felt that I looked okay. Especially from the back, it's obviously not an angle that you normally see yourself from and I was really surprised to see how good my waist looks in this. Actually, from the back there is very little that I don't like about my body in this photo.... apart from the weird burn/tan lines that I have going on! Even from the front.... which I like less..... there isn't a lot that I can find fault with. I wish my thighs were smaller, and my stomach flatter but my boobs look great and my arms are getting all lean again! So, yes, I am loving my body at every stage....Then I found one last photo that Martin had taken by mistake as I reached for my phone back and that was where the wobble happened..... and this is the photo that makes me really anxious about posting this blog.... this photo was taken......
And wow! I almost lost it. That tiny waist I was just looking at was gone. My thunder thighs were back and my stomach was bulging about in line with my boobs which made me so embarrassed. I mean, is this what people see when they look at me on a daily basis? How can this be my body? How could I have let myself get so out of control that this is what I look like now.....?
I had to stop myself from bursting into tears and getting my maxi dress out of the bag to cover up. I went back to the first two photos and called back into my mind all the positive things I had said about myself. I reminded myself of how good I felt the day before lying on the beach reading, calm... at peace with myself.
So.... my stomach is not okay right out! I am not happy with it.... yet. But there are lots of things about my body that I am happy with. I know that my body has changed lots since January because of the weight that I have already lost. I know that I still have a lot of changing to do but that is okay.
I've got 84 days until I go wedding dress shopping, that's 84 days to make great choices with my food, my workouts and to work on my self love/worth so that when I step into those gowns and find the one that I'm going to wear on my wedding day I feel like a rock star. And I will. I will get to my target weight, I will feel and look amazing in my wedding dress and feel confident, proud and in control of eating addiction.
I might not be happy with where I am now but I am learning to love my body now so that I can love it more later on. I will keep fighting for my goals and acknowledging the progress that I make along the way.
Love your body now.
Accept you for who you are now.
Allows yourself to see the progress that you have already made and celebrate now.
Embrace the change that is still yet to come.
You are beautiful now...... whatever stage of your journey you are at.
Be kind to yourself
xx
Wednesday, 19 July 2017
Underwater Revelations
Hey everyone!
First of all, I just want to say thank you! I couldn't believe how many views/reads that my last post got. Huge thanks to those of you who commented. Your support and encouragement is such great motivation for me! I hope you will continue to enjoy following me on my journey.
So, yesterday was weigh in day and I was really excited to see what I'd achieved. I knew that I'd been on plan this week so was hoping for big things! I lost 3lbs.... que mini celebration dance. Apparently, when you are on slimming world and stick to plan, you lose weight. Who knew?!
Feeling really motivated after my great loss and because I am now on summer holidays, I decided to go for a swim this morning. It has been way too long since I got into the pool - probably more than 6 months. Swimming is something that I love to do, it is my zen time. The pool is where I manage to get all my thoughts in order and sort out anything that is bothering me, whilst doing a little body magic and getting some toning done.
Usually, or should I say when I'm swimming regularly and have some level of physical fitness, I can swim a mile (64 lengths) in just over half an hour without question. Today was a different kettle of fish entirely. It hurt. It was hard. I had to really focus on my rhythm and my breathing - my body wasn't used to the breathing pattern I usually swim with, I was struggling to stay under the water as long I normally do. I had to shorten my stroke pattern so that I could breathe. My shoulders ached from the rotation, my kick was off. When I broke the surface or turned at the end of the lane, my face was actually hot out of the water - a sensation I am not used to. I felt so out of control, it was such a different feeling being in the pool out of practise than being in it when I can fly through the water and feel totally at one with the water. Today I was fighting it. (I realise that this sounds very zen and over dramatic but it's the best way I can describe how I was feeling this morning.)
The whole time I was swimming, I was thinking about this week and how I was proud of the successes I had made. I was thinking about how I'd managed to take back control from food demons, stay focused one meal at a time, not thinking about anything more than that, just making sure that one meal at a time I made it through the week on plan. Whilst I was thinking about one meal at a time, I was telling myself, just one more length - you can handle one more length. So I kept swimming, one length at a time and kept reflecting on my week.
I'd felt so out of control over the last month, with all the engangement celebtraions, half term, feeling unwell, being busy at work with the end of term rush..... all these things that forced me to be out of control. Then I thought about this week - I'd been to a family BBQ, it had been the end of term, I'd been to my new school for swap day where there was lots of cake and other goodies to say well done for the year and good luck for swap day. I'd been rushed - not able to always prepare meals in advance.... and I'd still lost 3lbs. How had I managed to stay in control this week and not over the last month when I had been just as busy?
That's when it hit me - Control is not a person who lives inside your head and decides to work some days and not others. Control is not something that works for you or lets you down. You are the control and chose when you want to use it. I could have decided not to indulge over the month where I was seeing friends and family who wanted to celebrate our special news. I could have chosen to not stay off plan for an extra day here or there because I'd already ruined my week. It was all my decision. This week I decided to stay in control - to embrace it, to enjoy it and to feel damn well proud of the control that I had. It felt so good to be able to go out and socialise and know that I was still sticking to plan, enjoying what I was eating and not feeling deprived even though those around me were indulging far more than I was.
If there is someone reading this today that is feeling out of control, or that they don't know how to get it back here are a few things that have helped me that you could think about.
1) Take it one meal at a time. One hour at a time if you have to. Stay in control where you can and really celebrate it when you do (but not with food/booze, as that kind of defeats the point - trust me, I could have so easily ordered a MASSIVE pizza last night to celebrate my weight loss but I know I would have felt so frustrated at myself afterwards for it).
2) Stop doubting. One really big barrier for me is all the previous times I have tried to lose weight, keep it off and failed. Why is this time any different? Why should I be successful this time? There is often a little voice in the back of my head telling me that I can't do it. That I will never be where I want to be, that I will never be beautiful. That I will never reach my goals. This week I told that voice to take a running jump of a cliff - I do not and will not let my disordered mind take over. My food addicted, self loathing, body hating 15 year old self stills lives inside my head - she probably always will but I know now that she is a part of my past. Instead of doubting youself, affirm yourself. Whatever works for you. Write affirmations on a mirror. Have them as the background on your phone. Stick them on your fridge door! Tell yourself what it is you really need to hear - not what the doubting voice inside is telling you.
You are a rockstar! You are awesome! You are powerful! You are strong! Whatever it is you want to feel, tell yourself that you are that - you deserve to feel empowered by yourself. Stop tearing yourself down and build yourself up instead.
3) Find a goal! This week, whenever I have wanted to cheat, or have that extra syn or go off plan - I've gone to my phone and looked at all of the pictures of wedding dresses I'm going to go and try on in few months. All of a sudden, that biscuit or piece of toast or whatever it was didn't seem so appealing - that wedding dress and the way I feel in it on the day I become Mrs Cooper is SO much more important than a piece of toast because I'm bored.
All of that happened in my head in 25mins!
I'm off on holiday for 2 weeks camping on Monday morning and I have a busy weekend of socialising ahead, so I will be arming myself with will power, determination and diet coke! We are catering for ourselves when we go away so that will help us stay more in control of what we eat but I'm sure there will be a few treats along the way. We are on holiday after all.
Remember - anyone out there feeling lost, or out of control - take a deep breath and start with one meal. Once that is out the way, you can think about the next meal. But start with one meal and be proud of yourself for taking the first step. I know you can do this!
Check in with you all soon,
Megan :) xx
First of all, I just want to say thank you! I couldn't believe how many views/reads that my last post got. Huge thanks to those of you who commented. Your support and encouragement is such great motivation for me! I hope you will continue to enjoy following me on my journey.
So, yesterday was weigh in day and I was really excited to see what I'd achieved. I knew that I'd been on plan this week so was hoping for big things! I lost 3lbs.... que mini celebration dance. Apparently, when you are on slimming world and stick to plan, you lose weight. Who knew?!
Feeling really motivated after my great loss and because I am now on summer holidays, I decided to go for a swim this morning. It has been way too long since I got into the pool - probably more than 6 months. Swimming is something that I love to do, it is my zen time. The pool is where I manage to get all my thoughts in order and sort out anything that is bothering me, whilst doing a little body magic and getting some toning done.
Usually, or should I say when I'm swimming regularly and have some level of physical fitness, I can swim a mile (64 lengths) in just over half an hour without question. Today was a different kettle of fish entirely. It hurt. It was hard. I had to really focus on my rhythm and my breathing - my body wasn't used to the breathing pattern I usually swim with, I was struggling to stay under the water as long I normally do. I had to shorten my stroke pattern so that I could breathe. My shoulders ached from the rotation, my kick was off. When I broke the surface or turned at the end of the lane, my face was actually hot out of the water - a sensation I am not used to. I felt so out of control, it was such a different feeling being in the pool out of practise than being in it when I can fly through the water and feel totally at one with the water. Today I was fighting it. (I realise that this sounds very zen and over dramatic but it's the best way I can describe how I was feeling this morning.)
The whole time I was swimming, I was thinking about this week and how I was proud of the successes I had made. I was thinking about how I'd managed to take back control from food demons, stay focused one meal at a time, not thinking about anything more than that, just making sure that one meal at a time I made it through the week on plan. Whilst I was thinking about one meal at a time, I was telling myself, just one more length - you can handle one more length. So I kept swimming, one length at a time and kept reflecting on my week.
I'd felt so out of control over the last month, with all the engangement celebtraions, half term, feeling unwell, being busy at work with the end of term rush..... all these things that forced me to be out of control. Then I thought about this week - I'd been to a family BBQ, it had been the end of term, I'd been to my new school for swap day where there was lots of cake and other goodies to say well done for the year and good luck for swap day. I'd been rushed - not able to always prepare meals in advance.... and I'd still lost 3lbs. How had I managed to stay in control this week and not over the last month when I had been just as busy?
That's when it hit me - Control is not a person who lives inside your head and decides to work some days and not others. Control is not something that works for you or lets you down. You are the control and chose when you want to use it. I could have decided not to indulge over the month where I was seeing friends and family who wanted to celebrate our special news. I could have chosen to not stay off plan for an extra day here or there because I'd already ruined my week. It was all my decision. This week I decided to stay in control - to embrace it, to enjoy it and to feel damn well proud of the control that I had. It felt so good to be able to go out and socialise and know that I was still sticking to plan, enjoying what I was eating and not feeling deprived even though those around me were indulging far more than I was.
If there is someone reading this today that is feeling out of control, or that they don't know how to get it back here are a few things that have helped me that you could think about.
1) Take it one meal at a time. One hour at a time if you have to. Stay in control where you can and really celebrate it when you do (but not with food/booze, as that kind of defeats the point - trust me, I could have so easily ordered a MASSIVE pizza last night to celebrate my weight loss but I know I would have felt so frustrated at myself afterwards for it).
2) Stop doubting. One really big barrier for me is all the previous times I have tried to lose weight, keep it off and failed. Why is this time any different? Why should I be successful this time? There is often a little voice in the back of my head telling me that I can't do it. That I will never be where I want to be, that I will never be beautiful. That I will never reach my goals. This week I told that voice to take a running jump of a cliff - I do not and will not let my disordered mind take over. My food addicted, self loathing, body hating 15 year old self stills lives inside my head - she probably always will but I know now that she is a part of my past. Instead of doubting youself, affirm yourself. Whatever works for you. Write affirmations on a mirror. Have them as the background on your phone. Stick them on your fridge door! Tell yourself what it is you really need to hear - not what the doubting voice inside is telling you.
You are a rockstar! You are awesome! You are powerful! You are strong! Whatever it is you want to feel, tell yourself that you are that - you deserve to feel empowered by yourself. Stop tearing yourself down and build yourself up instead.
3) Find a goal! This week, whenever I have wanted to cheat, or have that extra syn or go off plan - I've gone to my phone and looked at all of the pictures of wedding dresses I'm going to go and try on in few months. All of a sudden, that biscuit or piece of toast or whatever it was didn't seem so appealing - that wedding dress and the way I feel in it on the day I become Mrs Cooper is SO much more important than a piece of toast because I'm bored.
All of that happened in my head in 25mins!
I'm off on holiday for 2 weeks camping on Monday morning and I have a busy weekend of socialising ahead, so I will be arming myself with will power, determination and diet coke! We are catering for ourselves when we go away so that will help us stay more in control of what we eat but I'm sure there will be a few treats along the way. We are on holiday after all.
Remember - anyone out there feeling lost, or out of control - take a deep breath and start with one meal. Once that is out the way, you can think about the next meal. But start with one meal and be proud of yourself for taking the first step. I know you can do this!
Check in with you all soon,
Megan :) xx
Sunday, 16 July 2017
The Ultimate Motivation!
Hey everyone!
It turns out that the best way to keep myself accountable is when I'm blogging/posting everything on social media for all my friends/followers to see. So here I am again, to stay on the straight and narrow and share my journey over the next year with you.
It has been way too long - it turns out that the life of a teacher does not leave a lot of time for blogging.... or anything else as it happens.
So I think it's time for a little catch up. Since the last time that I posted on here a lot of stuff has happened in my life.
I joined Slimming World on January 3rd this year, and since then I've lost 1st 8lbs which I am so proud of. I have a long way to go but I now have the ultimate motivation because on the 1st June, I got engaged!
I couldn't be happier - I am now the future Mrs Cooper. It's a little over a year until I get married and 100 days until I go wedding dress shopping for the first time.
For the last month, I've been feeling a little out of control, not staying to plan, not staying to group, eating crap, self sabotaging basically. This week I decided enough is enough - my wedding is something that I absolutely do not want to look back on with regret and I know that a lot of that will depend on how I look.
It seems vain, sure, but I have struggled with how I looked at some many occasions. So many parties, Christmases, my graduation, family birthdays where I've looked at the photos and been shocked at how I look, been disappointed at how big I look in them. I don't want to feel like that looking at my wedding photos. I know that Martin couldn't give a monkeys - he loves me regardless of my size - and I couldn't be more thankful for that but for me, I want to feel comfortable and confident on my day - not self conscious. I want to be able to enjoy going shopping for my dress without worrying about how large I am or how flabby I look!
This week has a been a totally different story - I had a look online at one of the bridal shops that I definitely want to go to in October and saw some absolutely stunning dresses - dresses that I REALLY want to try on and I feel more focused than ever. I know that I can do it this time. Slimming World has really made me feel that I can manage my food addiction (because that is 100% what I have) and stay in control of it for the future. I'm taking it one day at a time, planning my eating, staying hydrated and reminding myself that I want to do this for a really important reason.
I already feel so much better having lost over a stone and a half - my clothes fit better, I feel more confident wearing my clothes and have even bought some new clothes that I love wearing now.
I've set myself a mini goal of losing a stone in the next 100 days before I go wedding dress shopping, I feel that that is a good goal and will help we feel more confident as I try all the dresses on. If I can achieve my goal I will have lost 2 and a half stone in 10 months and I'm hoping that will make me more comfortable in the big white gowns!!!!
Exciting times ahead. I'm going to try and check in every weekend from now until then and update you all with my progress. Hope you can stay with me and follow my journey leading up to the big day!
Wish me luck
M xx
It turns out that the best way to keep myself accountable is when I'm blogging/posting everything on social media for all my friends/followers to see. So here I am again, to stay on the straight and narrow and share my journey over the next year with you.
It has been way too long - it turns out that the life of a teacher does not leave a lot of time for blogging.... or anything else as it happens.
So I think it's time for a little catch up. Since the last time that I posted on here a lot of stuff has happened in my life.
I joined Slimming World on January 3rd this year, and since then I've lost 1st 8lbs which I am so proud of. I have a long way to go but I now have the ultimate motivation because on the 1st June, I got engaged!
I couldn't be happier - I am now the future Mrs Cooper. It's a little over a year until I get married and 100 days until I go wedding dress shopping for the first time.
For the last month, I've been feeling a little out of control, not staying to plan, not staying to group, eating crap, self sabotaging basically. This week I decided enough is enough - my wedding is something that I absolutely do not want to look back on with regret and I know that a lot of that will depend on how I look.
It seems vain, sure, but I have struggled with how I looked at some many occasions. So many parties, Christmases, my graduation, family birthdays where I've looked at the photos and been shocked at how I look, been disappointed at how big I look in them. I don't want to feel like that looking at my wedding photos. I know that Martin couldn't give a monkeys - he loves me regardless of my size - and I couldn't be more thankful for that but for me, I want to feel comfortable and confident on my day - not self conscious. I want to be able to enjoy going shopping for my dress without worrying about how large I am or how flabby I look!
This week has a been a totally different story - I had a look online at one of the bridal shops that I definitely want to go to in October and saw some absolutely stunning dresses - dresses that I REALLY want to try on and I feel more focused than ever. I know that I can do it this time. Slimming World has really made me feel that I can manage my food addiction (because that is 100% what I have) and stay in control of it for the future. I'm taking it one day at a time, planning my eating, staying hydrated and reminding myself that I want to do this for a really important reason.
I already feel so much better having lost over a stone and a half - my clothes fit better, I feel more confident wearing my clothes and have even bought some new clothes that I love wearing now.
I've set myself a mini goal of losing a stone in the next 100 days before I go wedding dress shopping, I feel that that is a good goal and will help we feel more confident as I try all the dresses on. If I can achieve my goal I will have lost 2 and a half stone in 10 months and I'm hoping that will make me more comfortable in the big white gowns!!!!
Exciting times ahead. I'm going to try and check in every weekend from now until then and update you all with my progress. Hope you can stay with me and follow my journey leading up to the big day!
Wish me luck
M xx
Friday, 7 October 2016
365 Days: 49lbs To Go
One week down, one pound gone. Which I suppose is fine. It's progress but I can't say that I'm completely happy with it.
I was at a wedding at the weekend so that was a write off straight away. Booze, wedding food, more booze.... no amount of crazy dancing on a dance floor can work that off. So I wasn't really expecting to see a massive loss on the scale but I was hoping for more than a pound.
I wasn't well for two days this week which didn't help. I wasn't really able to do a lot. On Tuesday I was feeling pretty rough but decided to still head for a swim. I had a pounding headache and by the time I'd done 20 lengths, my head was all over the place. I didn't have any energy left at all.... turns out I'd picked up a bug from a delightful child at school and spent the best part of the night in the bathroom (so for the overshare).... so Wednesday was a right off, I was really shaky and cold. I could just about handle toast but wasn't up to eating much at all. So that was 2 gym classes that I didn't make it to this week.
Thursday was better, I was feeling much more myself so decided to ramp it up a little to try and compensate for the wedding so I went to Zumba and danced my arse off (I was hoping for that to be literally as well) and after that went for a swim. I did 600meters in the pool after my hour long Zumba class and felt really good for it.
I felt like my diet has been okay since Monday, we're ignoring the wedding weekend, not too many carbs, lots of veg and fish....
This week has shown me that I need to ramp it up again with the exercise. I'm always hungry at the moment so don't really want to cut more food out of my diet so my only option is workout more. Need to find some more time in the week where I can get to a class or hit the pavement for a run... that is if I can still fit into my running shorts.
A little downer on this at the moment is that whilst it's taken me the best part of a month to lose 2 pounds, Martin has a lost a stone in that time. I'm really pleased for him, he's doing really well but it's a little frustrating where I'm the one trying to get down the gym and increase my exercise. I'm the one who's cut bread out almost completely from my diet and yet I'm not loosing any weight. It's really frustrating, I don't want to get all bitchy at him for it or be pissy but it is really disheartening to see that my efforts aren't paying off as quickly as his.
Anyway, just need to carry on with how I am doing at the moment, try and get in more exercise and see how that works out. Think I might start the 30 day squat challenge in the next couple of weeks too. I want to get the tone back in my thighs. They are in serious need of some attention at the moment.
So 49lbs to go, here's to the next 7 days.
Check in again soon with more progress.
Thanks for reading.
M x
I was at a wedding at the weekend so that was a write off straight away. Booze, wedding food, more booze.... no amount of crazy dancing on a dance floor can work that off. So I wasn't really expecting to see a massive loss on the scale but I was hoping for more than a pound.
I wasn't well for two days this week which didn't help. I wasn't really able to do a lot. On Tuesday I was feeling pretty rough but decided to still head for a swim. I had a pounding headache and by the time I'd done 20 lengths, my head was all over the place. I didn't have any energy left at all.... turns out I'd picked up a bug from a delightful child at school and spent the best part of the night in the bathroom (so for the overshare).... so Wednesday was a right off, I was really shaky and cold. I could just about handle toast but wasn't up to eating much at all. So that was 2 gym classes that I didn't make it to this week.
Thursday was better, I was feeling much more myself so decided to ramp it up a little to try and compensate for the wedding so I went to Zumba and danced my arse off (I was hoping for that to be literally as well) and after that went for a swim. I did 600meters in the pool after my hour long Zumba class and felt really good for it.
I felt like my diet has been okay since Monday, we're ignoring the wedding weekend, not too many carbs, lots of veg and fish....
This week has shown me that I need to ramp it up again with the exercise. I'm always hungry at the moment so don't really want to cut more food out of my diet so my only option is workout more. Need to find some more time in the week where I can get to a class or hit the pavement for a run... that is if I can still fit into my running shorts.
A little downer on this at the moment is that whilst it's taken me the best part of a month to lose 2 pounds, Martin has a lost a stone in that time. I'm really pleased for him, he's doing really well but it's a little frustrating where I'm the one trying to get down the gym and increase my exercise. I'm the one who's cut bread out almost completely from my diet and yet I'm not loosing any weight. It's really frustrating, I don't want to get all bitchy at him for it or be pissy but it is really disheartening to see that my efforts aren't paying off as quickly as his.
Anyway, just need to carry on with how I am doing at the moment, try and get in more exercise and see how that works out. Think I might start the 30 day squat challenge in the next couple of weeks too. I want to get the tone back in my thighs. They are in serious need of some attention at the moment.
So 49lbs to go, here's to the next 7 days.
Check in again soon with more progress.
Thanks for reading.
M x
Friday, 30 September 2016
365 Days To Make A Real Change!
They say bad things come in threes, don't they? Well I think 'warnings' come in threes too!
As some of you may be aware, I've struggled with my weight for a number of years, gaining and losing various amounts of weight but never managing to get down to the real weight I wanted to and keeping it off. There have been numerous reasons for this, including a serious injury, depression, laziness, being happy in a relationship is the newest addition to this list. And yes, they are all also excuses as to why I have lost control and gained weight again.
I had three 'warnings' hit me in quite quick succession that told me a few things that lead to one conclusion. You are out of control, you have gained a significant amount of weight in a rather short space of time, you are NOT happy with the way your body looks at the moment. The conclusion being - Megan, it is time to take back control and get yourself sorted out! You deserve to feel as happy in your body as you are with the rest of your life.
Even writing that, highlights to me one vital change from every other time that I have started to lose weight. In the past, it has very much been a 'if I lose weight, everything will sort itself out and I will be happy' and then I lost weight.... and everything wasn't okay and I wasn't happy. So, I would give up and lose interest and motivation and I'd put weight back on.
Now, when I actually think about it. I am very happy with myself. I love my career, I have an amazing partner who loves me regardless of how big I am or what clothes I can or can't fit into. I have finally realised that the happiness that I feel within myself has very little to do with the number on a scale. I can now appreciate just how lucky I am and what a fab life I have. I know that I would feel more comfortable in myself if I was slightly smaller and slightly fitter but it doesn't directly impact the person that I am or the happiness in my life now. So, that was a big positive step for me.
On to these 'warning' signs! I got home from a very lovely holiday in Croatia with Martin, and although we had had a wonderful time, I have a gorgeous tan, lovely natural highlights, I was very aware of my tummy in all the photos we had taken when we were out there. I had noticed, whilst on the beach, that I was one of very few women in a bikini. Now, there were women bigger and smaller than me in a bikini and I am in no way saying that larger women should not be in a two piece. Quite the opposite, they should wear whatever the hell they are comfortable in. But that was the problem, I really wasn't comfortable exposing my large, wobbly belly on the beach! For me, that is a terrifying concept, to show off the part of me I really dislike was a big no-no! I looked at women all over the beach of each shape and height and really envied them and their comfort in their own bodies!
The second warning sign was a really tough one for me to get over! It was pretty embarrassing really. Martin and I went away for a mini break up to Stratford-upon-Avon for his birthday over the weekend, which was so lovely! However, on the second to last day, I was getting dressed and realised that all the t-shirts I had packed were a little on the tight side... the moment when you have to ask your boyfriend to lend you some clothes because yours don't fit. I felt so uncomfortable in my own body, even in front of my boyfriend, to not be able to wear my own clothes!
The third sign was soul destroying. I don't know about other women, but I have a go to dress that is lovely and I feel beautiful in - and it has ALWAYS fit me, even when I've put on weight. Well, I wanted to wear it to a wedding reception recently and surprise surprise, it didn't fit me. Not even close to fitting me! At that point, I really couldn't ignore the fact that I had reached a point where things needed to change and fast.
I actually started writing this blog a month ago. I then started teaching and life got mental! I haven't had a chance to sit down and finish this blog since August. I have also been finding it really difficult to get exercise into my routine with the amount of work I'm doing as a trainee teacher. It's really tough to get to the gym when I don't leave work until nearly 6 most days and get into work by 7:15 every morning. I know it's an excuse but it is really tough - when you're shattered after teaching all day long, the last thing you want to do is hit the gym.
I know I have to do it. I really want to do it. I had three gym classes planned this week and I physically couldn't get to any of them because, each evening, I had so much to do for work the next day. I also know that there needs to be a balance in life, work and 'play'. I really miss working out, the endorphin rush, the sweat, the ache in my muscles when I've pushed really hard! I miss that. I really want to get back into the mindset where I enjoy exercise.
So, in the last month, I've only lost a pound. Luckily, I haven't put anything on. My diet has been good with a few cheat days (but sometimes a girl has got to eat cake) and I've been feeling really healthy... just not getting any exercise in. I know that if I start to hit the exercise, the weight will start to come off especially as I'm not putting on any weight with my diet the way that it is. I just need to up my calorie burn and the weight will come off.
It's Martin and I's first anniversary on Halloween and I'm going to use that as a deadline. Next year, on our 2nd anniversary, I want to be at least 50lbs lighter. 50lbs closer to my goal weight. This morning, when I got on the scale, I was 237lbs (a horrendously embarrassing number) but this time next year - when I hit my goal - I will be at 187. That's nearly the weight I was at when I was at my fittest, playing rugby and training for at least 10 hours a week. I know that it's possible for me to get there - I've been there before. When I was 180lbs, I felt so confident, so happy in my body, I could wear whatever I wanted without having to scrutinise my body in front of a mirror before I left to go out anywhere. I didn't have to panic that something I wanted to wear wouldn't fit me or that I'd have to have a back up outfit ready just in case the one I wanted to wear wouldn't look right because of the way if fit my body.
I cannot wait to the back in that place again!
So I'm giving myself a year (okay, a year and a month) to get back to where I want to be. Hopefully, 50lbs lost or more. I'd really like people to support me, and to keep me accountable so if you want to comment, please do! Any and all encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
I'll update soon with how I'm getting on, I hope to post once a week (every Friday, once I've been on the scale but with work the way it is, that may not be possible).
Wish me luck!!
As some of you may be aware, I've struggled with my weight for a number of years, gaining and losing various amounts of weight but never managing to get down to the real weight I wanted to and keeping it off. There have been numerous reasons for this, including a serious injury, depression, laziness, being happy in a relationship is the newest addition to this list. And yes, they are all also excuses as to why I have lost control and gained weight again.
I had three 'warnings' hit me in quite quick succession that told me a few things that lead to one conclusion. You are out of control, you have gained a significant amount of weight in a rather short space of time, you are NOT happy with the way your body looks at the moment. The conclusion being - Megan, it is time to take back control and get yourself sorted out! You deserve to feel as happy in your body as you are with the rest of your life.
Even writing that, highlights to me one vital change from every other time that I have started to lose weight. In the past, it has very much been a 'if I lose weight, everything will sort itself out and I will be happy' and then I lost weight.... and everything wasn't okay and I wasn't happy. So, I would give up and lose interest and motivation and I'd put weight back on.
Now, when I actually think about it. I am very happy with myself. I love my career, I have an amazing partner who loves me regardless of how big I am or what clothes I can or can't fit into. I have finally realised that the happiness that I feel within myself has very little to do with the number on a scale. I can now appreciate just how lucky I am and what a fab life I have. I know that I would feel more comfortable in myself if I was slightly smaller and slightly fitter but it doesn't directly impact the person that I am or the happiness in my life now. So, that was a big positive step for me.
On to these 'warning' signs! I got home from a very lovely holiday in Croatia with Martin, and although we had had a wonderful time, I have a gorgeous tan, lovely natural highlights, I was very aware of my tummy in all the photos we had taken when we were out there. I had noticed, whilst on the beach, that I was one of very few women in a bikini. Now, there were women bigger and smaller than me in a bikini and I am in no way saying that larger women should not be in a two piece. Quite the opposite, they should wear whatever the hell they are comfortable in. But that was the problem, I really wasn't comfortable exposing my large, wobbly belly on the beach! For me, that is a terrifying concept, to show off the part of me I really dislike was a big no-no! I looked at women all over the beach of each shape and height and really envied them and their comfort in their own bodies!
The second warning sign was a really tough one for me to get over! It was pretty embarrassing really. Martin and I went away for a mini break up to Stratford-upon-Avon for his birthday over the weekend, which was so lovely! However, on the second to last day, I was getting dressed and realised that all the t-shirts I had packed were a little on the tight side... the moment when you have to ask your boyfriend to lend you some clothes because yours don't fit. I felt so uncomfortable in my own body, even in front of my boyfriend, to not be able to wear my own clothes!
The third sign was soul destroying. I don't know about other women, but I have a go to dress that is lovely and I feel beautiful in - and it has ALWAYS fit me, even when I've put on weight. Well, I wanted to wear it to a wedding reception recently and surprise surprise, it didn't fit me. Not even close to fitting me! At that point, I really couldn't ignore the fact that I had reached a point where things needed to change and fast.
I actually started writing this blog a month ago. I then started teaching and life got mental! I haven't had a chance to sit down and finish this blog since August. I have also been finding it really difficult to get exercise into my routine with the amount of work I'm doing as a trainee teacher. It's really tough to get to the gym when I don't leave work until nearly 6 most days and get into work by 7:15 every morning. I know it's an excuse but it is really tough - when you're shattered after teaching all day long, the last thing you want to do is hit the gym.
I know I have to do it. I really want to do it. I had three gym classes planned this week and I physically couldn't get to any of them because, each evening, I had so much to do for work the next day. I also know that there needs to be a balance in life, work and 'play'. I really miss working out, the endorphin rush, the sweat, the ache in my muscles when I've pushed really hard! I miss that. I really want to get back into the mindset where I enjoy exercise.
So, in the last month, I've only lost a pound. Luckily, I haven't put anything on. My diet has been good with a few cheat days (but sometimes a girl has got to eat cake) and I've been feeling really healthy... just not getting any exercise in. I know that if I start to hit the exercise, the weight will start to come off especially as I'm not putting on any weight with my diet the way that it is. I just need to up my calorie burn and the weight will come off.
It's Martin and I's first anniversary on Halloween and I'm going to use that as a deadline. Next year, on our 2nd anniversary, I want to be at least 50lbs lighter. 50lbs closer to my goal weight. This morning, when I got on the scale, I was 237lbs (a horrendously embarrassing number) but this time next year - when I hit my goal - I will be at 187. That's nearly the weight I was at when I was at my fittest, playing rugby and training for at least 10 hours a week. I know that it's possible for me to get there - I've been there before. When I was 180lbs, I felt so confident, so happy in my body, I could wear whatever I wanted without having to scrutinise my body in front of a mirror before I left to go out anywhere. I didn't have to panic that something I wanted to wear wouldn't fit me or that I'd have to have a back up outfit ready just in case the one I wanted to wear wouldn't look right because of the way if fit my body.
I cannot wait to the back in that place again!
So I'm giving myself a year (okay, a year and a month) to get back to where I want to be. Hopefully, 50lbs lost or more. I'd really like people to support me, and to keep me accountable so if you want to comment, please do! Any and all encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
I'll update soon with how I'm getting on, I hope to post once a week (every Friday, once I've been on the scale but with work the way it is, that may not be possible).
Wish me luck!!
Sunday, 10 July 2016
Triathlon Number Three
So, today, I competed in my third triathlon event. It was at Dorney Lake in Windsor (UK). It's such a beautiful place to take part in an event like this. The course is great, the event is run by Human Race and it's always a brilliant day. Novice and experienced triathletes alike join together to fund raise, work hard and complete a major physical challenge.
Going into it this year, I was really apprehensive. I hadn't done nearly enough training - read next to nothing. I've hit a few snags along the way since my last triathlon, which have made it really hard to stay focused and committing to training. For starters, around Christmas/New Year, my anxiety attacks came back quite violently and I wasn't really in any mood to do any training at all. Winter is always the hardest time of year for me to train anyway. Who wants to be out in the freezing cold on a bike or pounding the pavement when it's -2 degrees outside?
Then I put my back out really badly which meant that any sort of exercise that wasn't swimming was incredibly painful. I couldn't cycle or run from January to May so my time window for real training shrunk dramatically due to injury. Also, being in a new relationship very much so (no matter how wrongly) affected my training schedule. I mean, if you had the option of early Sunday morning 5km run or staying in for breakfast in bed with a movie and the boyfriend..... which would you choose?
When I started my triathlon this morning, I hadn't cycled for a month and I hadn't done any brick training.... I was definitely feeling under prepared and very nervous that I wasn't going to be able to make it round the course without bursting into tears or at all.
However, by some sort of miracle, I did it! Not quite my PB but not far off and considering my near total lack of training I am so proud of myself. I wanted under 1hour 45mins and I completed it in 1hour 41mins, only 4 minutes slower than my PB anyway. I am so impressed that I still managed to get round in a really decent time and next year, if I actually do some training, I might even get a new PB.
For me this year, I actually felt my most comfortable the whole way round the course. Even on the run, which is always my worst section out of the three, I felt really calm and in control. I hurt from the word go, straight out of transition my legs were burning and I had a killer stitch for the first km and half. But I knew that if I stopped jogging and started walking, I'd never get going again. I just kept going steadily and made myself little goals so that I was constantly thinking about my next one, not worrying about how much distance I had left to run.
For example, 'run to the next bridge', 'just get to the next meter marker', 'keep going until that bottle thrown on the floor'. So, yeah, not always the most exciting goals but enough to keep my going. I also threw myself into encouraging every person who ran past me in the other direction to keep going. It was a great way to distract myself from actually running. Basically, anything to keep myself going and not think about running was a great help.
I was so happy that I finished and proud that I made it round. I'm still not where I want to be with the way I look. I was hoping to be at my goal weight for this triathlon but life sort of happened and not all the weight came off. I was really worried about posting these photos but then I looked at some of the photos from last years triathlon, and I can see some changes in my body.
Same again, left is last year, right is this year. I think this year, my thighs are slimmer, there's more definition around my knee, my stomach is flatter.
I haven't made the progress that I wanted to, but I have made progress and I know that if I keep going (and get back to training a little more) I'll get there. I'm trying to learn to appreciate even the small changes that I can see..... even if they aren't what I wanted initially.
I can't wait for sign up to open for next year so that I can get ready to compete again! Definitely one of the highlights of my year.
Going into it this year, I was really apprehensive. I hadn't done nearly enough training - read next to nothing. I've hit a few snags along the way since my last triathlon, which have made it really hard to stay focused and committing to training. For starters, around Christmas/New Year, my anxiety attacks came back quite violently and I wasn't really in any mood to do any training at all. Winter is always the hardest time of year for me to train anyway. Who wants to be out in the freezing cold on a bike or pounding the pavement when it's -2 degrees outside?
Then I put my back out really badly which meant that any sort of exercise that wasn't swimming was incredibly painful. I couldn't cycle or run from January to May so my time window for real training shrunk dramatically due to injury. Also, being in a new relationship very much so (no matter how wrongly) affected my training schedule. I mean, if you had the option of early Sunday morning 5km run or staying in for breakfast in bed with a movie and the boyfriend..... which would you choose?
When I started my triathlon this morning, I hadn't cycled for a month and I hadn't done any brick training.... I was definitely feeling under prepared and very nervous that I wasn't going to be able to make it round the course without bursting into tears or at all.
However, by some sort of miracle, I did it! Not quite my PB but not far off and considering my near total lack of training I am so proud of myself. I wanted under 1hour 45mins and I completed it in 1hour 41mins, only 4 minutes slower than my PB anyway. I am so impressed that I still managed to get round in a really decent time and next year, if I actually do some training, I might even get a new PB.
For me this year, I actually felt my most comfortable the whole way round the course. Even on the run, which is always my worst section out of the three, I felt really calm and in control. I hurt from the word go, straight out of transition my legs were burning and I had a killer stitch for the first km and half. But I knew that if I stopped jogging and started walking, I'd never get going again. I just kept going steadily and made myself little goals so that I was constantly thinking about my next one, not worrying about how much distance I had left to run.
For example, 'run to the next bridge', 'just get to the next meter marker', 'keep going until that bottle thrown on the floor'. So, yeah, not always the most exciting goals but enough to keep my going. I also threw myself into encouraging every person who ran past me in the other direction to keep going. It was a great way to distract myself from actually running. Basically, anything to keep myself going and not think about running was a great help.
I was so happy that I finished and proud that I made it round. I'm still not where I want to be with the way I look. I was hoping to be at my goal weight for this triathlon but life sort of happened and not all the weight came off. I was really worried about posting these photos but then I looked at some of the photos from last years triathlon, and I can see some changes in my body.
My face is so much thinner. The photo on the left (above) is me at the end of the triathlon last year, and the picture on the right, is me at the beginning of this years. My cheeks are flatter, my chin and jaw line are more defined.
I haven't made the progress that I wanted to, but I have made progress and I know that if I keep going (and get back to training a little more) I'll get there. I'm trying to learn to appreciate even the small changes that I can see..... even if they aren't what I wanted initially.
I can't wait for sign up to open for next year so that I can get ready to compete again! Definitely one of the highlights of my year.
Check back in soon!!
M xx
Wednesday, 8 June 2016
A Very Long Absence....
So, I haven't written anything on this blog in such a long time! Life got pretty crazy and my blogging just sort of drifted off into obscurity.
Since I last posted I've lost a stone, fallen in love, moved into a flat with my new man, put back on nearly all of the stone that I lost, landed a new job and probably a lot more along the way.
Living with a man isn't half interesting..... getting to know someone's most private habits and nuances is an interesting journey to embark on. Who knew that the way someone squeezes the toothpaste tube could be so frustrating??!!
It's been a really intense few months, bloke wise, trying to impress a new family. A new part of a family you are hoping to become a part of. The pressure of that is immense at times, making sure that I don't let my other half down, making sure that I impress the people closest to him and show them the best version of me.
For me, this all very new. I've not met a boyfriend's family since I was about 14 and you had no choice but to have tea with the family after school if you ever wanted to see your 'boyfriend' outside of the classroom. But this, this is proper, grown up, I-think-this-is-forever kind of love and meeting the family of that sort of love is quite genuinely terrifying (sometimes).
Having said that, all of the family I have met, I've loved straight away and have made me feel so welcome into their little (or actually not that little) clan. I've still got lots of family members to meet as well apparently..... so there are more nerves and anxiety and stresses to come. :P It's all part of this amazing new journey of meeting all the people who are going to be a major part of my future. I can't quite believe how stupidly happy I am, how lucky I am to have found the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with and for them to feel the same.
Because I'm so stupidly happy, the weight loss/training has gone a little off the rails which is one of the reasons I wanted to start blogging again. I think if I put more focus on writing about my weight loss and training for my next triathlon, it might encourage me to actually stay on track a little more. I'm trying to courage M (my man) to do the same. Hopefully, we can get fit and healthy together, and then enjoy being slightly slimmer on our holiday to Croatia in the summer.
I've got a triathlon in just over a month and training has been really tricky since Christmas as my back has been pretty dodgy since then. There have been weeks where I literally haven't been able to do more than walk because I've been in so much pain, which means that I'm really behind on where I'd like to be fitness wise for my upcoming event. I doubt I'm going to get a PB this time around which is quite frustrating really. I can remember the buzz I felt at the end of last year's triathlon when I knew that I could get round the course faster than I'd completed it.
I know that I am smaller than I was when I competed last year, and I still have time to slim down about but I do seem to be finding it very hard to say no to the bad foods. It's becoming all too easy to skip a workout and come home to M instead. I know that this is pretty stupid and counterproductive to feeling good about myself. Spending time with M gives me the same happy feeling that I get when I work out, and it's so much more tempting to come home for dinner and a cuddle than it is to slog it out in the pool or in a gym class.
So, this needs to change.... quite a lot of it really. The eating habits, the work out schedule, I need to stop skipping the gym to see M.... I mean, I live with him, he's not going anywhere in the extra hour that I might spend in the pool/gym.
So my new blog posts will pretty much be about my weight loss, training, eating habits. If I can hold myself accountable to my (very few) readers then maybe I'll be able to get back on the band wagon and shift some weight.
I've started to doubt myself again and started to dislike what I look like in the mirror. It was such a great time when I actually liked what I saw in the mirror and didn't worry about my big, wobbly belly during the day in whatever it was that I was wearing. I want to get back to that point. Just before Christmas, I felt really great about the way I looked and now.... I feel pretty flabby and unattractive most of the time.
So, here is to getting back on track, a pound at a time, no crazy diets, no banishing certain foods, no deprivation.... just steady, sensible training and diet. I know it works, I know that I have done it before and that I can do it again. I just need to keep it up and not let my new found love sabotage my goals.
Stay tuned in for updates.
M xx
Since I last posted I've lost a stone, fallen in love, moved into a flat with my new man, put back on nearly all of the stone that I lost, landed a new job and probably a lot more along the way.
Living with a man isn't half interesting..... getting to know someone's most private habits and nuances is an interesting journey to embark on. Who knew that the way someone squeezes the toothpaste tube could be so frustrating??!!
It's been a really intense few months, bloke wise, trying to impress a new family. A new part of a family you are hoping to become a part of. The pressure of that is immense at times, making sure that I don't let my other half down, making sure that I impress the people closest to him and show them the best version of me.
For me, this all very new. I've not met a boyfriend's family since I was about 14 and you had no choice but to have tea with the family after school if you ever wanted to see your 'boyfriend' outside of the classroom. But this, this is proper, grown up, I-think-this-is-forever kind of love and meeting the family of that sort of love is quite genuinely terrifying (sometimes).
Having said that, all of the family I have met, I've loved straight away and have made me feel so welcome into their little (or actually not that little) clan. I've still got lots of family members to meet as well apparently..... so there are more nerves and anxiety and stresses to come. :P It's all part of this amazing new journey of meeting all the people who are going to be a major part of my future. I can't quite believe how stupidly happy I am, how lucky I am to have found the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with and for them to feel the same.
Because I'm so stupidly happy, the weight loss/training has gone a little off the rails which is one of the reasons I wanted to start blogging again. I think if I put more focus on writing about my weight loss and training for my next triathlon, it might encourage me to actually stay on track a little more. I'm trying to courage M (my man) to do the same. Hopefully, we can get fit and healthy together, and then enjoy being slightly slimmer on our holiday to Croatia in the summer.
I've got a triathlon in just over a month and training has been really tricky since Christmas as my back has been pretty dodgy since then. There have been weeks where I literally haven't been able to do more than walk because I've been in so much pain, which means that I'm really behind on where I'd like to be fitness wise for my upcoming event. I doubt I'm going to get a PB this time around which is quite frustrating really. I can remember the buzz I felt at the end of last year's triathlon when I knew that I could get round the course faster than I'd completed it.
I know that I am smaller than I was when I competed last year, and I still have time to slim down about but I do seem to be finding it very hard to say no to the bad foods. It's becoming all too easy to skip a workout and come home to M instead. I know that this is pretty stupid and counterproductive to feeling good about myself. Spending time with M gives me the same happy feeling that I get when I work out, and it's so much more tempting to come home for dinner and a cuddle than it is to slog it out in the pool or in a gym class.
So, this needs to change.... quite a lot of it really. The eating habits, the work out schedule, I need to stop skipping the gym to see M.... I mean, I live with him, he's not going anywhere in the extra hour that I might spend in the pool/gym.
So my new blog posts will pretty much be about my weight loss, training, eating habits. If I can hold myself accountable to my (very few) readers then maybe I'll be able to get back on the band wagon and shift some weight.
I've started to doubt myself again and started to dislike what I look like in the mirror. It was such a great time when I actually liked what I saw in the mirror and didn't worry about my big, wobbly belly during the day in whatever it was that I was wearing. I want to get back to that point. Just before Christmas, I felt really great about the way I looked and now.... I feel pretty flabby and unattractive most of the time.
So, here is to getting back on track, a pound at a time, no crazy diets, no banishing certain foods, no deprivation.... just steady, sensible training and diet. I know it works, I know that I have done it before and that I can do it again. I just need to keep it up and not let my new found love sabotage my goals.
Stay tuned in for updates.
M xx
Friday, 26 June 2015
C9 Days 3 to 9 - The Reboot
This blog post is long over due!
I finished C9 ages ago and just haven't been able to find any time to sit and actually write this.
So, during days 3 to 9 you are actually allowed to eat one 600 calorie meal a day. They recommend you eat it in the evening but you can eat it at lunch time if that fits your routine better. There were 2 days where I did eat at lunch time because it fit better with the routine of my day.
It was tough, I mean, I wanted to eat all the time and being surrounded by cakes and things in the staffroom at school didn't help much but I did it. I made it through the whole thing without cheating or snacking or feeling massively deprived.
By the end of the 9 days I'd lost 3 kilos exactly! I was so happy with the results, it was nice to see the scale shift and my measurements go down too.
I think the hardest part for me was people asking me what I was doing. Why wasn't I eating? Did I need some support? One friend said to me that she was worried I was developing a worrying relationship with food....
I spent the whole 'worry' speech thinking that my relationship with food was what got me into all thr trouble in the first place. My relationship with food lead me to hating my body and myself for 7 years. I was finally feeling like I had kicked my food addiction, was taking control back and giving my body a kick start/reboot and was getting ridiculed for it. That was really hard - having your hard work stepped on a little by people who don't have the same rubbish history with their weight/body confidence and then don't understand what it's like to know that you can't eat a certain type of food because you won't stop with just a little bit. The addict in you can't... so you eat and eat... That is a feeling that I still have to deal with and something that some people have never experienced.
But - I stayed strong and said that I was just giving my system a reboot and a detox to all the people who questioned me and just carried on with the programme. And I'm so glad that I did!
3 kilos! That's all the proof I needed.
For a write up of the first two days, click here.
To see the C9 website and buy your own kit, click here.
Check in with y'all soon,
M xx
I finished C9 ages ago and just haven't been able to find any time to sit and actually write this.
So, during days 3 to 9 you are actually allowed to eat one 600 calorie meal a day. They recommend you eat it in the evening but you can eat it at lunch time if that fits your routine better. There were 2 days where I did eat at lunch time because it fit better with the routine of my day.
It was tough, I mean, I wanted to eat all the time and being surrounded by cakes and things in the staffroom at school didn't help much but I did it. I made it through the whole thing without cheating or snacking or feeling massively deprived.
By the end of the 9 days I'd lost 3 kilos exactly! I was so happy with the results, it was nice to see the scale shift and my measurements go down too.
I think the hardest part for me was people asking me what I was doing. Why wasn't I eating? Did I need some support? One friend said to me that she was worried I was developing a worrying relationship with food....
I spent the whole 'worry' speech thinking that my relationship with food was what got me into all thr trouble in the first place. My relationship with food lead me to hating my body and myself for 7 years. I was finally feeling like I had kicked my food addiction, was taking control back and giving my body a kick start/reboot and was getting ridiculed for it. That was really hard - having your hard work stepped on a little by people who don't have the same rubbish history with their weight/body confidence and then don't understand what it's like to know that you can't eat a certain type of food because you won't stop with just a little bit. The addict in you can't... so you eat and eat... That is a feeling that I still have to deal with and something that some people have never experienced.
But - I stayed strong and said that I was just giving my system a reboot and a detox to all the people who questioned me and just carried on with the programme. And I'm so glad that I did!
3 kilos! That's all the proof I needed.
For a write up of the first two days, click here.
To see the C9 website and buy your own kit, click here.
Check in with y'all soon,
M xx
Monday, 15 June 2015
OOTD: Monday 15th June 2015
Happy Monday everyone! Only 5 weeks of school left until summer break! COME ON!
This dress is from Next, the blue floral pattern is beautiful. To start with I didn't like the cut of this dress. It has a seam that runs right across the middle of my torso and it made me look a little weird. Now that I've lost a little bit of my spare tire (or Cake Shelf as Sarah Millican calls it) it actually fits okay and shows off my waist line. The length was perfect for school too so it was a win all round!
I didn't take a picture of my shoes that I wore today. They are stunning - I will upload a picture when I can.
M xx
Thursday, 11 June 2015
C9 Days 1 and 2 - The Cleanse
I suppose the hardest thing about the C9 cleanse is the first two days. There is no real food that you eat... Well not meals anyway. You are allowed a certain amount of fruit and veg but other than that, no solid food passes your lips. It is all liquid!
I was kind of expecting this, a cleanse usually flushes everything from your system, which involves a lot of liquid but I don't think my bladder was prepared for the sheer volume of liquid that my body would be processing.... If that's too much information, I apologise whole hardly to you, my lovely readers.
I did the first two days over a weekend so I knew I wouldn't have to be dealing with low calorie, very little food grumpiness syndrome which I was very likely to get.... And by Saturday afternoon I was very glad that I had made that decision - not because I was grumpy, I actually felt really good, I just needed to be near a bathroom all afternoon as my bladder went into hyperdrive!!
The weighing in times work really well, you only weigh in on days 1,3,6 and 9 (although I might weigh in on the morning of what would be day 10 to add in the last day to the process). You weigh yourself on the morning you start, obviously, but you also take a load of measurements which help track how your body changes. This was particularly good for me as the scale has not been budging since January but the cm's have been coming off, so I was more interested in my measurment changes than the scale.
Having said that... Over the two days of detox I dropped 1.9kilos which I was over the moon about. Giving my system a kick start seemed to be working. I'd lost cm's around the main areas I wanted too as well - waist and hips. Knowing that some of this could just be bloating going down I tried not to take it too much to heart. I focused on the physical changes I noticed. I had more energy on day 2, let alone for the days since (I'm writing this whilst on day 6 - energy levels still really high) and there is a pair of particularly tight jeans which are slipping on easier now so somewhere around my body has gotten smaller.
All results so far have been great and I've genuinely not found it that difficult to be on mainly liquid.... (After day 2, you get to eat food!!!)
Come back soon for a review of days 3 to 9... I have my fingers crossed for good things.
M xx
I was kind of expecting this, a cleanse usually flushes everything from your system, which involves a lot of liquid but I don't think my bladder was prepared for the sheer volume of liquid that my body would be processing.... If that's too much information, I apologise whole hardly to you, my lovely readers.
I did the first two days over a weekend so I knew I wouldn't have to be dealing with low calorie, very little food grumpiness syndrome which I was very likely to get.... And by Saturday afternoon I was very glad that I had made that decision - not because I was grumpy, I actually felt really good, I just needed to be near a bathroom all afternoon as my bladder went into hyperdrive!!
The weighing in times work really well, you only weigh in on days 1,3,6 and 9 (although I might weigh in on the morning of what would be day 10 to add in the last day to the process). You weigh yourself on the morning you start, obviously, but you also take a load of measurements which help track how your body changes. This was particularly good for me as the scale has not been budging since January but the cm's have been coming off, so I was more interested in my measurment changes than the scale.
Having said that... Over the two days of detox I dropped 1.9kilos which I was over the moon about. Giving my system a kick start seemed to be working. I'd lost cm's around the main areas I wanted too as well - waist and hips. Knowing that some of this could just be bloating going down I tried not to take it too much to heart. I focused on the physical changes I noticed. I had more energy on day 2, let alone for the days since (I'm writing this whilst on day 6 - energy levels still really high) and there is a pair of particularly tight jeans which are slipping on easier now so somewhere around my body has gotten smaller.
All results so far have been great and I've genuinely not found it that difficult to be on mainly liquid.... (After day 2, you get to eat food!!!)
Come back soon for a review of days 3 to 9... I have my fingers crossed for good things.
M xx
Wednesday, 10 June 2015
OOTD: Wednesday 10th June 2015
Hey lovely readers!
As another way to embrace my beauty and force myself to see the good things about the way I look.....not because I'm vain but because I would like to feel confident about myself..... I am started an outfit of the day post series.
I don't weather I will actually post every day due to time commitments etc but I will as often as I can.
As another way to embrace my beauty and force myself to see the good things about the way I look.....not because I'm vain but because I would like to feel confident about myself..... I am started an outfit of the day post series.
I don't weather I will actually post every day due to time commitments etc but I will as often as I can.
Firstly, I will need to use better lighting in future... secondly, this mirror makes my legs look really short haha.
Okay! The jeans are from New Look a few years ago, they are a camouflage green with a very handy 'sock zip' that take away the issues of rolling-up-skinny-jeans-to-put-on-long-socks. The blouse is from Next, I love the cut of it and the style and how 'floaty' it is. Perfect for a summery day in the sun. The cardigan is New Look, it's a dusty pale pink, really lovely as a light cover up when it's breezy but to too chilly.
On the whole, I really like this outfit. I think it looks okay and it has a lot of good stories behind it. I shrunk the jeans in the tumble dryer at uni and I couldn't get into them for the life of me. I then shrunk myself to get back into them! WAHOO! *punches air*
Similar story with the blouse. I bought it as part of a 'new job' wardrobe but it was a little tight over my tummy and around my love handles. I handed realised how much my body had changed shape since September until I put this on this morning and it floated over my waist and hips beautifully.
Maybe this project will be a success after all!!
Tuesday, 9 June 2015
Another New PB! On A Roll! - A Triathlon Diary
I only went and bloody did it again!
A second PB.... 2 runs in a row! I am so chuffed! I have to give a shout out, again, to my wonderful father who coached we through the whole thing.
At around 3km I hit a wall and thought I lungs were about to spontaneously combust but Dad wouldn't let me stop - or slow down - and by the end of the 5km we had actually picked up the pace again and we knocked a whole chunk of time off.
I genuinely went into shock at the end when I actually realised what I'd achieved and had a little weep.
Yes! You read that right, I cried at the end of a run.... I am a massive emotional wet rag but I don't really care because I am so damn proud of the progress I've made.
A second PB.... 2 runs in a row! I am so chuffed! I have to give a shout out, again, to my wonderful father who coached we through the whole thing.
At around 3km I hit a wall and thought I lungs were about to spontaneously combust but Dad wouldn't let me stop - or slow down - and by the end of the 5km we had actually picked up the pace again and we knocked a whole chunk of time off.
I genuinely went into shock at the end when I actually realised what I'd achieved and had a little weep.
Yes! You read that right, I cried at the end of a run.... I am a massive emotional wet rag but I don't really care because I am so damn proud of the progress I've made.
From the run last Monday, I knocked off a further 1 minute and 12 seconds..... that's a total of 1 minute and 55 seconds faster over just 3 runs.
Here is what I captioned the photo with on Instagram:
If you would like to check out my Instagram account for more training photos and other randomness, my username is megs_100
A New PB! - A Triathlon Diary
I not only have a triathlon coming up next month, I also have a 10km run. So, all the run training I'm doing is helping (hopefully) towards both of these events.
I've only recently got back into running to the point where I'm enjoying it. I think having my dad as a training partner really helps as he is a great source of encouragement and a fantastic pace maker.... and he doesn't let me slow down!
For a while, back in 2014, I was doing ParkRun on a Saturday morning at a local but fell out of the habit over the winter. My fastest 5km at ParkRun was 34:56 which I was happy with. I was only a year out of major knee surgery, I was over weight and unfit.
On June 1st 2015 (my second real training run in about 4 months) I smashed this time out of the water! I was SO pleased!
I've only recently got back into running to the point where I'm enjoying it. I think having my dad as a training partner really helps as he is a great source of encouragement and a fantastic pace maker.... and he doesn't let me slow down!
For a while, back in 2014, I was doing ParkRun on a Saturday morning at a local but fell out of the habit over the winter. My fastest 5km at ParkRun was 34:56 which I was happy with. I was only a year out of major knee surgery, I was over weight and unfit.
On June 1st 2015 (my second real training run in about 4 months) I smashed this time out of the water! I was SO pleased!
Considering that I have not been doing a lot of running training, I am super pleased with knocking 43 seconds off of my personal best! It's gives me a lot of confidence for the training runs still to come and also, the actual event that are now less than a month away!
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